Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood
First things first, I've found the best coffee shop situated a mere 2 minute walk away from my house and that is where I will now be writing most of my posts. Like a true remote worker.
It's dead cheap, the coffees come with a truffle and the cookies melt in the middle. On top of this and perhaps more important is the fact its open till 21:30 on weekdays and sells beer at the equivalent to £1.50. It's decor suggest Scandinavian but with brighter lighting, positive music and browner people. A hexagonal logo which appears around the cafe tessellates nicely as tables and on the walls something which appeals to my sometimes logical mind.
Earlier today whilst indulging in said truffles and coffee I arranged a hefty refund for my flight to Argentina as I will stay here hopefully for another 4 months. This put me in a mood I can only describe as blissful. I usually attribute this mood to when all my senses are positively stimulated and I have many moments that are stored as snapshot memories that fill these criteria, including; one in Copenhagen, many atop mountains, a couple in the sea but most in good company with the usual backdrop of a bar.
The best way to describe how I was feeling is just to leave this here...
This guy can express how I felt or can feel and actually I am finding myself dancing around lot, having discovered quite a lot of good music whilst being here. But I'm pretty sure I don't look as good. In fact now we can view our online lessons at any time we desire and I'm certain I don't.
Earlier in the week however I did not feel so good. I spent Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday pretty much in the house besides a few supermarket visits. This was a mistake. At the time I never really felt like I needed to leave. I could cook and save money and I spent lots of time coding and learning Portuguese. The evenings I had the NBA.
I was in a bit of a conflict with myself, I mean... I'm here to live, not just be a tourist. I cant go out and party every night, eat out and see everything like I'm travelling. But even at home just staying in can drive a person mental and I am here in Rio, I do need to do a bit more or it will past me by. So for the weekends at least I'm gunna try and make sure I do more sightseeing kinda things and I'm gunna get out the house every day even if it's just to the cafe. Overall it was just too much time with myself and as most people know, too much time with me can get annoying. lol. That's a joke, LAUGH. But I can get myself down a bit and convince myself I'm not very good or good at anything, or that nobody actually likes me. Which is of course absurd.
So on Thursday we went to go see Venom and even something simple like heading to the cinema made me feel a million times better. And everyone hating on Venom, you're wrong, which is fine, you're allowed to be wrong, but still...you're wrong.
I loved it. Fun, easy, Venom's a bit of a dude and it fits in with the narrative of the 2 systems, the inner battle of the ego and the id which has appeared in a lot of art I'm consuming recently. Ok, in us it may not be as intense as an alien wanting to eat peoples heads off (in most of us) but the idea came from somewhere right and the more I talk to people about these sort of things, the more I hear the words "I get that".
One of my favourite things to hear, it causes a strong connection and a fantastic feeling of being understood.
It helps me not to pathologise things that I think and feel, and convince myself I'm crazy when its completely normal. So thanks Eddie/Venom, you get it, and you helped me accept this side of me rather than fighting against it, I definitely feel more at one. He's also a Warriors fan. My guy.
This stems to all art, it can be used to express things which can otherwise be hard to do. Through painting, writing, characters and in my opinion the most powerful, Music.
To hear somebody else describing the emotion you are feeling better than you can articulate it yourself is an amazing feeling. You not only feel understood but also understand better. Kid Cudi was always great for me, amongst others but I'm sure we all have our artists. Even the notes on a piano or a harp can strike a chord (completely intended) with how we feel and I just think that's an amazing social phenomenon. Where would we be without music, or other forms of art.
But ye, lesson learned, get out of the house, don't stay trapped inside your own house and your own head. Be social. Have fun.
I found a bar that shows basketball also 2 minutes in the opposite direction to the cafe so I'm pretty set. But as I sit here, about to read my second book this week and off to the beach and a beer festival thing this eve, I'm content, with both myself and how everything is going.
I struggled to decide which version is better so here's both. You decide.
